A Tribute To Legos

When I was twenty-two, my girlfriend of five years left me.  Losing her was traumatic. It reminded me of when I was a seven and I lost a one-of-a-kind Lego piece in my front yard: a tiny, neon-green pirate hook that was only obtainable by purchasing that precise set. I cried and cried, and though my mom and I searched the grass for hours, we couldn’t find it...

Ah, Legos. Nothing else even compares on the nostalgia-meter. I had a very happy childhood, most of which was spent with Legos. I was a Legomaniac. I still have five enormous bins full of them in my closet -- well over a million pieces. I try not to think about how much money my parents spent on all those sets. Legos were all I ever wanted for birthdays and Christmases year after year.

I began like most kids, building the sets per the instructions, playing with them for a few days, then wrecking them to construct something of my own design. But as the years passed, I began getting more creative. One day I invented the concept of “Lego Games,” which were essentially videogames, only with Legos. See, my childhood dream was to design videogames when I grew up, and with Legos I could create a fully interactive rough drafts of the games, complete with towns, dungeons, weapons, items, enemies, secrets, mini-games.. you name it! Then when my friends came ever, I’d give them a designated Lego man and they'd try to beat it.

Lego Games instantly became a huge hit in our neighborhood. Soon all my friends were building games of their own. But no one's were quite as elaborate as mine. I would spend months creating enormous, room-filling games that weren’t even allowed to be glimpsed until completion. I would type and print page after page of dialogue for my characters, which I would rehearse and perform during gameplay. I even selected classical music for each area of my games, assigning my little sister the task of operating the CD player during gameplay.

My friends and I continued making Lego Games well into seventh grade, long after most kids grew out of them. But one by one, my friends, too, lost interest, until there was no one left to play my games anymore. It grew embarrassing whenever I'd bring new friends into my room, where they'd see the mountain of Legos scattered across my floor. Not long after, I forced myself to pack the pieces away in the closet. It took a tremendous effort to let them go. Giving them up was just as hard as losing the love of my life.

Though I stopped playing Legos regularly, they never really disappeared from my life. Somehow they kept on popping up again. I used them to build a science project in high school. I attended a party for a college graduate who hosted a nostalgic Lego-building competition. And whenever I was at my ex-girlfriend’s house, I’d find an excuse to build Legos with her little brothers. It was a guilty pleasure to relive my childhood.

I didn't realize it at the time, but Legos were the single greatest foreshadow to the screenwriting career I would later take on years later. They were more than simple, plastic toys. They were a gateway to the art of storytelling. They awoke the creative side of me that may have otherwise remained undiscovered. They allowed me to create, share my work with others, get feedback and develop my artistic muscles. I credit Legos heavily in the building of who I am today, and I highly encourage purchasing sets for your own children (or passing on your personal collection).

I feel sorry for people that grow up without Legos. They miss out on one of the great rites of passage, at least in my life. Perhaps they find other outlets for their creativity.

I recently received a love letter from my ex-girlfriend. It reminded me of when I was seventeen, raking leaves in the front yard, and I came across a tiny, neon-green pirate hook embedded in the earth. It had endured a decade of Winters, dozens of rainstorms and thousands of lawn mower attacks, yet was still perfectly interlockable with its counterpart.

Top 20 Story-Songs

Songs that tell a story… I find them so much more interesting than the average lyrics. I racked my brain for days trying to remember all the best story-songs I've heard in my lifetime. Funny how such trivial things can become so important to you later on. I came up with nine good ones before resorting to the internet for a tenth, where I discovered so many more that I had to turn my top 10 into a top 20. And just to clarify, I consider a "story" one that has a clear beginning, middle and an end. Download these and you'll have yourself a better set of short stories than most book collections:

#20: Hurricane
Bob Dylan

This protest song was about a real-life black boxer called the Hurricane, who was sentenced to life in prison for a crime he clearly didn’t commit. Six years after the song was released, Rubin “Hurricane” Carter was set free, all charges dropped, his verdict deemed unfair due to racial discrimination. I like to think Dylan’s song made a difference.

#19: The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Theme Song
Will Smith

The theme song of Fresh Prince tells how a West Philly black kid came to live in a mansion in Bel-Air. The irresistably catchy hiphop lyrics were written and performed by the show’s star, Will Smith. I prefer the televised version over the extended.

#18: Last Kiss
Wayne Cochran & the C.C. Riders

A tragedy about a young couple who get in a car accident that gets to me every time. It's since been covered by many bands including The Cavaliers, Wednesday and Pearl Jam, though none have topped the original.

#17: Copacabana
Barry Manilow

This disco hit tells the tragedy of Lola and Tony, who once worked at a night club in New York. Why do all the saddest stories have the most upbeat musical accompaniments? Perhaps it’s to please both types of listeners: casual listeners who just like moving to the beat, and people like me who actually pay attention to the lyrics. Also be sure to check out Richard Cleese’s parody, “Star Wars Cantina.”

#16: Yoda
Weird Al

Speaking of Star Wars, Weird Al's brilliant parody of "Lola" by The Kinks actually tops the original. It narrates all the scenes with Luke and Yoda in The Empire Strikes Back. Gotta love it.

#15: Stan
Eminem

Told through a series of letters and audio recordings, a deranged fan, obsessed with Eminem, grows increasingly more unstable as his hero fails to write him back. Dido sings the chorus, which is actually a modified verse from her song, “Thank You.” It’s a disturbing rap with a surprisingly inspiring ending. The term “Stan” has since become the nickname for anyone obsessed with something.

#14: A Love Ballad
Bo Burnham

All the other songs on this list are very popular, commercial songs. This one is just a tragicomic love song a teenager put on Youtube. It’s a hilarious, disgusting yet heartfelt story about an unlikely couple. Hint: think Harold and Maude.

#13: April 29, 1992
Sublime

Also known as “April 26, 1992,” as that’s the date Brad Nowell sang by mistake in the take they decided to keep. The song follows rioters looting stores in response to the controversial Rodney King verdict. Funny, visual and powerful all at once.

#12: Tribute
Tenacious D

From the opening line, “This is the greatest and best song in the world,” you know you’re in for a treat. It’s about two hitchhikers that meet a demon who tests their musical abilities, à la "Devil Went Down To Georgia." I've never heard a song that was so funny and epic at the same time. I especially dig the archaic language: “Be you angels?” “Nay! WE ARE BUT MEN!”

#11: The General
Dispatch

An anti-war rock song about an old general who realizes the error of his ways. It always reminded me of Buster Keaton's anti-war silent film of the same title. Hey, I wonder if the song matches up to the film, like Wizard of Oz and Dark Side of the Moon. Probably not, considering the song's only four minutes long...

#10: Skin
Rascal Flatts

Also known as "Sarabeth," "Skin" is about a high school girl who is diagnosed with cancer. Call me a softy, but this one chokes me up more than any other. Damn these tear-jerking country songs! Pass me a Puff!

#9: Scenes From An Italian Restaurant
Billy Joel

This jazzy piece features two old friends waxing nostalgic in an Italian restaurant. Particularly, they reminisce about the most popular couple in high school, Brenda and Eddie, who ended up parting ways. The song really brings you back to the good ol' days. And could the pair in the restaurant be Brenda and Eddie?

#8: Hotel California
The Eagles

A traveler checks in at a mysterious hotel and gets more than he bargained for. This metaphoric song has been subject to a variety of interpretations. To me, it’s about heartbreak; after checking in, the traveler falls in love with the hotel whore, an employee who sleeps with all the male tenants. My interpretation of the final lines, “You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave!” -- the only way out of true heartbreak is suicide.

#7: Bohemian Rhapsody
Queen

The lyrics to this British rock opera have been endlessly analyzed, and the band wisely refuses to give explanation, encouraging you to come up with your own. Well, here’s mine: the beginning is clearly about a man who’s committed a murder, bidding farewell to his family and friends before going to prison -- I think we can all agree on that. But that’s where the song gets... abstract, to say the least. I interpret the opera section as the trial ("Let him go!" "We will not let him go!" etc.) and the rockin' section to be the man's desperate attempt to break out of the courtroom. In the bittersweet ending, he's left alone in his jail cell with nothing but regrets.

#6: The Trial
Pink Floyd

If you thought "Bohemian Rhapsody" was mad, get a load of this courtroom rock opera. The entire concept album, The Wall, told the story of a man plagued by traumatic events throughout his life, each causing him to add “another brick in the wall,” a metaphysical barrier he built to isolate and protect himself from pains of the outside world. "The Trial" is the totally insane climax of the album, in which the protagonist is put on an imaginary trial in his mind, his conscience serving as Judge. It's an artistic, lunatic, and ultimately liberating song with fantastic voice-work by Roger Waters. You truly have to hear it to believe it, though you may not fully appreciate it without listening to the entire 2-disc album first.

#5: A Boy Named Sue
Johnny Cash

Cash wrote a number of good story-songs, but this one is my fave. The title character is hunting down his absent father, who ruined Sue's life by giving him a girl’s name before he split. It's a funny, badass tune featuring the best fight scene ever put in song.

#4: Escape
Rupert Holmes

Tired of his girlfriend, a man responds to an ad in the personal columns that begins, “If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain…” Yeah, that song. If you ask me, it’s the best love-story-song ever written. It also really warps you away to a tropical paradise.

#3: Date Rape
Sublime

There's nothing like a good revenge story. This one's about a girl who gets date raped, then takes the guy to court (and for once, the courtroom scene isn't nucking futs). Sublime was the only band that got two songs on the list -- they have a real knack for musical storytelling, with their unique blend of humor, attitude and message, not to mention their kickass punk-reggae style.

#2: The Homecoming Queen's Got a Gun
Julie Brown

Upon being crowned homecoming queen, Debi whips out a gun and starts shooting up all her classmates and teachers at the prom. It was a hilarious satirical song in the eighties, a decade before school shootings became a prevalent problem. Today, the song’s a bit more controversial. But the most shocking thing to me was hearing Debi’s motive in the end.

#1: The Devil Went Down To Georgia
Charlie Daniels Band

In this fantasy-folk tale, Satan challenges a talented young fiddle player, Johnny, to a musical duel. If Johnny wins, he gets a golden fiddle. If he loses, the devil gets his soul. It’s an epic hoe-down showdown that’s guaranteed to set your blood ablaze!